What if things had gone the way I wanted?

2014, and I'm still harping on the fact that there some things that I hadn't done enough because I didn't allow myself to go against myself. 

I could have had so much job experience if I had followed my will and went out to explore the world when I was 16. I could have a proper saving instead of living day by day like the current state. I could have enough financial ability to help myself get out of the mess and get out of the country as and when I want. 
I might have been to places I've been wanting to visit. 

I might have met more people that enrich my life. Might have gotten into a relationship (just saying, you know sometimes, it just sucks to be the only standing in between couples and couples and couples) Hey, I meant it's not like I didn't experience that feeling. So out of place, so weird and I hated myself there when I was there. 

I might have gotten a car license with my own ability and be driving my mum everywhere she wants to go instead of her telling me how much she wants to get to somewhere but the people who drives ain't home at all.  

I might be even really living on myself instead of turning to the siblings when I got so broke to a certain extent. I might not even need to have bills coming to me unpaid with the interests piling up and up and up till my line had to be terminated for one day. 

But thankfully, things turned out just like it had. 
I may not have much job experience but I really did enjoyed schooling life with my holidays. Sometimes, lazing at home feels so damn good you don't even feel like stepping out of the house at all. 
I may not have explored the world enough but even if I did, I wondered if I had been matured enough to understand the world. 
This, I confirmed it when I went to HongKong for the second time last year, I realised I hadn't seen enough of HongKong when I was there for the first time. Probably because I was young and there were school rules to follow strictly compared to the second one when we had our own time after returning to the hotel in the evening. But HongKong was so much different when I was there the second time as compared to the first time when most of the place I went were the same. Well, this, I believe is the mindset. 

It's good to be looking at the world in a more matured mind, I guess. To make worth to what the world has to offer and of course, to make worth of the air ticket that could had been a bomb. 

I'm 20 this year, it's where something ends and the life enters a new phase. 
That set me thinking of what I had to do when I turn to a certain age, and I guess, I'm matured enough to make realistic goals at this point of time. Think I got quite some time to grow out of my comfort zone huh. 

I landed myself a 2 year contract full time job after being unable to look at myself doing nothing and your friends and the people around you keeps asking what you're going to do after internship. Found the jobs alone, went for the interviews alone and talking to people that I met for the first time. Think I grew up quite a lot especially when all the interviewers (err, ok, 2 of them) like the way I am, saying I'm bubbly and all which, I grew kind of confident. The most rewarding part was how my Sister felt so proud of me when I told her how I handled my interviews. :) 

Registered myself to driving lessons which I think I'm kind of late to be doing so right now. But, it's better late than nothing right. So, I'm spending the next one year on my driving license with the money I'm earning as a full timer. I'll be proud of myself I guess. 

There's a few things I've listed down to be done before a certain age and I guess, I will be able to do so.
Because, "if a Taurus wants to get something done determined, a Taurus can." This is quite true anyways. 

It's been a wordy post, okbye.